VO: The nation's favorite celebrities... Wow.

VO: ..paired up with an expert... Ow.

Ow.

Get it sorted.

VO: ..and a classic car.

She's beautiful.

We're steaming.

VO: Their mission - to scour Britain for antiques.

Is that antique?

I'll take it.

I'll take it.

I'll take it.

VO: The aim, to make the biggest profit at auction.

(GAVEL) VO: But it's no easy ride...

There's a dog chasing us!

VO: Who will find a hidden gem?

I love that.

VO: Who will take the biggest risk?

Ah!

VO: Will anybody follow expert advice?

Yeah, uh, OK, I know what that means.

Woo-hoo!

VO: There will be worthy winners...

Yes!

VO: ..and valiant losers.

Disaster.

VO: Put your pedal to the metal.

Let's go shopping.

Woo-hoo!

VO: This is the Celebrity Antiques Road Trip!

VO: Not half!

VO: Yikes, what's that off roader coming our way, eh?

Oh my God, look how steep this hill is, this is never gonna make it up there.

Oh, God, oh!

Don't panic!

VO: Welcome to smashing Shropshire.

Today we're road tripping with two pals, comedian Russell Kane and presenter and model, AJ Odudu.

And what better vehicle than a 1960s Land Rover?

Right on trend.

I thought we were gonna have, like, a Porsche or a Bentley or an old Mercedes.

It's time for me, yeah.

This is like from some Irish farm.

(LAUGHS) I was told we were gonna be driving an antique car.

Antique has so many different meanings, doesn't it?

(LAUGHS) I'm so glad I'm not wearing sunglasses, as well, and driving into sunlight.

VO: Renaissance man, Russell won the prestigious Edinburgh Comedy Award in 2010, and since then has enjoyed glittering success in the UK stand-up circuit.

There's a dog chasing us!

Oh my God, I can't even outrun a dog, he's catching up!

He's catching up!

(THEY LAUGH) It's like a horror film.

I thought we were gonna be going in antique shops and looking at brass, not being outrun by a rabid animal.

VO: Bolton gal AJ has proven her presenting talents on British reality TV.

But she's rocketed to stardom on Instagram and YouTube with her fitness know how.

AJ: Don't you think this is cute?

I'm not the most confident driver anyway.

I don't like windy roads and oh my God... And you don't like oncoming traffic?

I can't cuz I... That's the road, Russell.

AJ: I will get a bargain.

I'm gonna use the walk away tactic and everything.

VO: Guiding our celebrity twosome is a fine pair of antiquers.

It's Margie Cooper and Philip Serrell.

Oh, look at this weather, Phil.

Isn't it lovely?

Yeah.

VO: Margie's at the wheel of a rather gorgeous 1967 Volvo 1800.

Famously driven by Simon Templar in the classic 1960s show, The Saint.

Do you think I look like the Saint, Margie, Roger Moore?

Eh... Because he always had a glamorous lady, didn't he?

PHIL: Yeah?

MARGIE: There's a likeness.

And you're my glamorous lady.

Aww.

I can smell something.

It wasn't me.

It's not me.

I can smell burning.

It's not me.

VO: It's not me either.

Oh dear.

What's the chat in the Landy, then?

Competitive, anyone?

I think your charm and your humor...

Shut up.

..is gonna get you the biggest bargains.

You're just trying to, like, do me with reverse psychology.

No, I'm not trying to do you with reverse... You'll be like, "Babe, babe... "Let me have that pocket watch for 100."

(LAUGHS) Then you'll get it.

Now, do you think they're gonna be competitive, these two?

I bet mine is.

I think AJ's gonna be really competitive.

I'm not a competitive person at all, I can't bear it.

I would lose the race on purpose just so the girls were laughing at me.

I was one of those guys.

(AJ LAUGHS) And steal the winner's girlfriend.

AJ, she's a fitness guru like myself.

(LAUGHS) Why are you laughing?

She might have a few tips... Why are you laughing?

(LAUGHS) She might have a few... What's funny?

She might have a few tips for you.

Margie, please!

VO: Let's just hope you're all fit and ready for your celebrities.

Bring it on, eh?

PHIL: Look at that, eh?

A sturdy Lanny.

PHIL: Morning!

MARGIE: Hi!

AJ: Hiya!

RUSSELL: Hey, how you doing?

AJ: How are you?

PHIL: How are you?

Hi, nice to meet you.

How you doing?

I'm Russell.

MARGIE: Are you all set?

Come on, let's go and do some shopping.

VO: AJ is joining up with Phil in the Volvo, while Margie is roughing it with Russ in the Land Rover.

Right, we ready?

Eh, this is worse than when I drove.

Oh my God!

RUSSELL: Slow down!

MARGIE: (LAUGHS) VO: All set.

And they're off!

So you are Russell, not Russ?

Either or is fine.

Russell or Russ.

RUSSELL: Yep, I'm not precious.

MARGIE: Well...

Unlike silver, which I believe you're a connoisseur of.

RUSSELL: (SNORTS) MARGIE: Oh, a little bit.

That's my first antique pun.

What's your favorite period in history?

Dunno.

Like, the 80s.

What, the 1880s?

No, like the 1980s.

I'm working with a child.

(LAUGHS) You'll be pleased to know I have been watching your videos.

RUSSELL: Oh, brilliant.

MARGIE: And chuckling all...

I tried to get those removed from the internet, cuz I didn't know she was filming.

(MARGIE CHUCKLES) PHIL: So we've got £400.

400 big ones.

Yeah, 400 smackeroonies.

How much do you wanna spend, do you think?

I wanna spend all of it.

Oh no.

Oh no, oh no.

Philip, listen!

PHIL: No, no, no... AJ: Money is there to be spent.

I'm good on just straight motorway driving.

But I don't like wiggly country road driving, or night time driving.

They're dangerous, aren't they?

You'd think after stand-up, not much would scare me.

Do you think my role here is to advise you or to rein you in?

I think you might have to rein me in.

I know, I'm kinda thinking that already.

I feel like, I see it, I like it, I buy it.

I don't put too much thought into it, to be honest.

This isn't going to go very well at all, is it?

VO: You've not even started yet, Phil.

VO: Everyone is heading for an auction at Penkridge.

But first both teams are making their way to Weston Heath just a few miles from Newport in Shropshire.

VO: As the name might suggest, Corner Farm Antiques is housed within a restored farmhouse, and it's huge.

Not particularly on the corner of anything.

PHIL: Well here we are, here we are, here we are.

VO: Here you are!

Look who's keen to buy some antiques then.

AJ: Yes!

Oh my gosh, I can see chandeliers already.

VO: Each team has £400 to spend.

I love it.

I'm in love.

I love this place!

VO: There doesn't seem to be much from the 1980s in this antique shop.

AJ: I love this.

Makes you seem intelligent if you've got a globe.

I think every house with a globe, I just think, "oh, you're classy, you are."

PHIL: Look at this.

Nail set, manicure set.

Boring.

Right, OK. Fine.

Look at this.

Quirky, stand out.

Little jug, little fish jug.

Catch of the day.

I think this is just going to be a little bit harder than I thought it was going to be.

VO: I think you might be right there, Phil.

Please don't break anything.

VO: Ah well.

Look who's arrived.

Finally.

Better late than never, eh?

MARGIE: Here we are.

Rightio.

They're arrived, Russell.

Doesn't matter, they've got no taste.

We'll still win.

VO: He's not even set foot in a shop yet.

That's confidence, Zebedee.

It looks like I've just won the... # It's coming home!

# It's not... (LAUGHS) MARGIE: Is it very old?

RUSSELL: So I'm thinking outside the box here.

MARGIE: Yeah, go on.

Think outside the box.

Going for something so naff it's good.

You'd be surprised what, you know, people will buy, thinking it's on trend.

Once you go past naff into Toby jug, it could sell.

Yeah, but remember... Look at this bad boy, for example.

Hang on, we're selling.

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

We're selling near...in the midlands.

Yeah.

And where are we reasonably near?

Stoke-on-Trent.

And where are all these made?

Wolverhampton?

VO: No.

VO: The original salt glazed Toby originated in Staffordshire in the mid 18th century.

MARGIE: So the place is awash with 'em.

Yeah, but not one with a parrot and one leg.

I must say, he's quite nice, but... RUSSELL: 28 quid.

That's worth a punt, surely.

Shall we put that onto our shortlist?

If you want to.

Yeah, I think so.

VO: Oh Margie!

RUSSELL: I say go for kooky weird stuff that we know is not worth that money but has an angle that can sit practically in someone's home.

So we can have a selling angle on it.

That's my strategy.

VO: And Phil thought he was going to struggle.

Still, what was Russ saying about taste?

MARGIE: What a beauty.

That's how we found my cousin Darren in Ibiza.

(MARGIE LAUGHS) He was on the beach in Ibiza at 7am.

And he's still got that face now, sadly.

Have you ever seen an uglier thing?

Would you want that on your sideboard?

He was like, Pacha was amazing.

D'you reckon, Darren?

(THEY LAUGH) This one looks like the bloke helping AJ.

(THEY LAUGH) Oh!

AJ, what do you think to this?

VO: Talking of Phil, how's the other team faring?

This is oak.

Yeah.

OK.

This was made... Oak-ay.

PHIL: Oak-ay, yes.

AJ: (LAUGHS) Gonna be a very long and hard day.

I had to do it, come on.

I thought that you'd appreciate a dad joke.

VO: Phil's found a lovely old coffer.

This is made out of oak.

Yeah.

It dates to somewhere between 1680 and 1710.

So it's old.

Almost as old as me, before you get it in.

Right?

If you look at those legs, what I love about that instantly is most of these sat on old flagstone floors.

And when they washed the flagstone floors, they got a pail of water, chucked it on the floor.

And so these feet, they rot off.

These feet are just as the good Lord intended them.

AJ: Oh!

Now, these hinges are not at all original.

The other thing is, this is a candle box here, look.

And what I'm... A great a bit of social history.

So you lift that up and you'd have had candles and whatever in there.

And the wax from the candles kept moths away from your clothes.

Who would've had this?

Who would've owned it?

In the 17th century, you know, that would've been someone of middle standing in society.

So someone with a bit of cash?

Yeah.

15 years ago, it was probably 5-800 quid.

Now... What do you reckon it'll go for now?

At auction, that's £120-180 today.

But you need to try and buy it for £100.

VO: Which would be half price.

There's 200 on the ticket.

But I reckon we could get him down, whatever it is.

Cuz that's not an original top, there's damage on the bottom.

These locks don't work, the hinges aren't original.

D'you know what I mean?

I've even spotted a few gaps in the woodwork there.

This girl's on the money.

This is good.

She's on the money.

I'm going to be good at haggling.

Let's do it!

You're gonna be a star.

Go on then.

Let's find him.

VO: Here you go then.

Gird your loins, dealer, Tim.

Great name.

Tim.

Just the guy we wanna see.

So, what if we shake hands on it now, walk away, pay cash, on £130?

Yeah, I bought it for 100 so you can have it for 130.

AJ: Yeah!

PHIL: You're a star.

AJ: Thank you.

PHIL: Well done you.

I could kiss you.

Mwah, mwah.

Thank you so much.

RUSSELL: AJ just kissed the guy, and hugged the guy that works here.

She went "thanks, babe".

How am I supposed to compete with that?

I'll do it.

That's what I'm worried about.

Stay by the clocks!

It's already expensive enough.

Say, say... the older one's more my age anyway.

(LAUGHS) VO: Hey Margie!

AJ and Phil have secured their first purchase of the trip and head on.

AJ: Time to go.

(PHIL CHUCKLES) I'm quite pleased with that, AJ.

I don't know what you think?

AJ: Me too.

VO: Leaving Russell and Margie the run of the shop.

But are they any closer to a purchase?

Hey look, everyone, I'm on grinder.

You are on grinder.

We're like the warehouse of the world with our stuff, in this country.

And that, fact that that's Victorian, 10 a penny.

Yeah but you could also wear it as a hat and stop the aliens sending messages to you.

(LAUGHS) Leave that alone.

Margie, look.

I spotted this one.

I really love my coffee.

Yeah?

Nice looking coffee pot, it's described as.

Yeah.

And the feet, is that a giveaway?

MARGIE: That is a big giveaway.

So what sort of era?

Which makes it a little bit different to the ordinary.

Art nouveau feet.

Art nouveau, so that makes it 1920s, 30s?

Early.

1900.

1900?

Fantastic.

Could even be 1890.

But, I wanna be a misery guts, as usual.

Always looking for trouble.

Go on.

It's too dear.

58 quid.

And he's not gonna go that far down.

I don't know, it's a showstopper, that.

I know it is but hey, still... What's the mat...what's the material, silverplate?

Silverplate.

Why is it...

But it's a really nice one.

What does that mean on the bottom there?

It just says Howard and Sons.

So it's got... Oh, it's made in Glasgae.

It was probably full of Irn Bru for about 15 years.

EPNS.

But, so what does that 2004 mean then?

That's just...that's just numbers from the...from the... That's nothing... Is this 10 years old?

No, is it fish.

(SCOTTISH ACCENT) This was made in Glasgow in 2004.

MARGIE: Very classy.

That is a nice thing.

If you can buy that at the right money, kiddo... RUSSELL: OK. MARGIE: ..buy it!

VO: This is your moment, Russ.

Are we opting for wit or charm?

Here we go.

Hi, I'm Russell.

Hi Russell, nice to meet you.

I'm Rosie.

Hi Rosie.

ROSIE: Hiya.

RUSSELL: This is Marge.

MARGIE: Hello dear.

ROSIE: Hello Marge.

I noticed...

I've not seen one of these since 1998.

(MARGIE LAUGHS) How much for your antique laptop?

I'm joking.

It's vintage.

I'm joking.

I've seen something that we're quite keen on.

It's this coffee pot.

ROSIE: OK, yeah.

Art nouveau.

That's the one.

But my expert here... Yeah.

..who seems to think we might be able to do a little bit better on the price.

MARGIE: A lot better.

58.

Em, could do it for 38.

RUSSELL: Can we knock it to 35?

For you, Russell, we'll do it for 35.

Yes!

Thank you, deal.

Is that good?

35, you happy?

MARGIE: Let's do it.

Yeah.

She... That is a...

In her world, that is a smile.

VO: Then there's the controversial matter of that 10 a penny Toby jug.

Do you want that Toby jug?

You do, don't you?

I do.

I'm sorry, I just...

I just...

I've got this voice telling me it's gonna sell.

Right, OK. We're having the Toby jug.

The long john silver, please.

So it's 28 and 35.

Which when I was at school was... 63.

> 107.

(THEY LAUGH) RUSSELL: 63.

MARGIE: 63.

I've not used cash for so long, what are the purple ones?

(MARGIE LAUGHS) VO: That's both teams off to a flying start.

And with the booty safely in the boot, it's time to hit the road.

VO: Now, AJ and Phil's tour is taking them slightly off track.

But watch out, Phil's trying to get down with the kids.

I'm gonna rebrand myself, so I think I'm gonna be PS.

Yeah?

You're AJ, I'm PS.

AJ and PS on tour.

AJ and PS on tour.

Yeah.

Now, I like AJ and Philip on tour.

That sounds so much better.

PHIL: AJ and Philip?

AJ: Yeah.

OK. Philip and AJ!

On tour.

Here we go!

Here we go!

Here we go!

VO: Their scenic Shropshire tour is taking them to the hamlet of Pickstock.

VO: And to nearby Wellbank Farm.

Home to both the luscious evergreen shrub lavender and the fragrant Joanna Spencer... AJ: How lovely to see you!

VO: ..who has been growing lavender for 15 years.

But the plant is firmly rooted in the area's history.

When was lavender first used, when did it come to prominence?

Well, it was first used, first written about, in the 12th century by Hildegard of Bingen, who wrote a fantastic medical treatise on herbs and the treatment of various ailments with herbs.

But it goes on throughout history, and Elizabeth I was said to have used it for her migraines.

VO: Her use of lavender was not just medicinal.

She was also partial to lavender jelly.

She carried posies of lavender and had it scattered before her to fend off the vile stench.

From Elizabethan times to the Victorian era, no genteel lady went beyond our shores without a flask of English lavender in her handbag.

AJ: So this is fit for a queen.

Has royalty always liked it?

Yes indeed.

Queen Victoria was absolutely passionate about it.

She adored lavender and she perfumed her whole house with it, and encouraged her ladies in waiting to use it.

Did others follow suit?

Well indeed they did.

It became very very fashionable.

All the aristocracy and the upper classes wanted to follow suit, and so there was a huge drive to plant more lavender.

And it encouraged the whole lavender industry in the south of England in Victorian times.

PHIL: Victoria clearly loved lavender, but was there any scientific basis for what it did?

Not until the sort of later Victorian period.

It was used as a disinfectant, they didn't know why.

Towards the end of the early 1900s, a scientist was doing experiments when he burnt himself badly, and he plunged his arm into a vat of lavender oil that he happened to have beside him.

And was absolutely astounded at the healing properties, his burn healed up beautifully.

And so from then on, it has been used and it was used extensively in World War I with soldiers being burnt on the front, for healing and that sort of thing.

VO: Away from the history and hearsay, the lavender here is tended traditionally by hand.

And who better to show Phil and AJ the works than Joanna's husband Robin?

You could get a job doing that here.

(AJ LAUGHS) What you saying, I'm a natural?

You are.

ROBIN: I think we've got enough there, folks, so let's go and distil the oil.

AJ: Yes.

PHIL: Right.

ROBIN: I'm gonna cut the lavender, I want you to fill the cylinder there and the alembic hood.

VO: The distillation of the oil is carried out in the same way it's been done for thousands of years.

ROBIN: Stuff it in as hard as you can.

AJ: This is part science, part wizardry.

ROBIN: And part physical training.

You get mus... You're gonna have muscles.

PHIL: It's a workout, AJ.

AJ and the Lavender Hill Mob.

How long is that gonna take to work its way through?

< Once it starts to boil, about eight minutes.

Eight to 10 minutes.

AJ: No way.

VO: Bit of elbow grease, and the Lavender Hill Mob are ready to distil all that lovely lavender into pure oil.

But first, the messy bit.

What is this?

It looks like porridge.

It's not quite porridge, it's simply flour and water.

Once the heat hits it, it makes a rock hard seal.

Now, I have turned it on so you wanna hurry up cuz it's gonna get hot in a minute.

What?

Oh my gosh, quick.

AJ: Got a constant supply.

Yeah.

VO: And with that musical cue, it's time for tea.

Darling!

Hello.

How civilized is this?

Tea for two, and two for tea.

AJ: Oh, Joanna!

Here we go.

You're spoiling us.

That's your tea.

And here is your lavender scone.

Relax.

I just want you to know that we're deriving no pleasure from this at all, are we?

AJ: Absolutely not.

PHIL: You know?

No, seriously, this is work, isn't it?

This is hard work.

Somebody's gotta do it.

Tough day.

It's been tough at the coalface.

RUSSELL: Don't kill 'em, please.

VO: Time now to catch up with Margie and Russell.

The thing you've got on your side with me... Yeah?

..is although I'm not competitive, I am interested in certain types of antiques.

Right.

And what are those?

I love watches.

I'm wearing one of my favorite watches today, I'm wearing a self-winding Oris.

RUSSELL: Em, I have bought a... MARGIE: Got a Brega.

Yes, I know Brega well.

Very nice, that's a manual, isn't it?

Yeah.

Oops!

(THEY LAUGH) At least we died talking about antiques!

VO: Hands on the wheel.

Eyes on the road.

VO: The next shopping stop for Russell and Margie is the hamlet of Rudge Heath.

Ah!

Now then, what are we gonna find in here, Mr Kane?

Citizen Kane, anybody called you that?

They have.

VO: Jones of Shropshire is an antique center full to the brim with all manner of timely treasures.

RUSSELL: I do like kooky... VO: After spending £63 so far from his £400 budget, Russell has £337 left to spend.

And after that garishly, gaudy Toby jug buy, what taste?

What's next?

Is that a real...what it says it is?

It says it's a geisha's shoe.

Well you've seen pictures, haven't you?

With that kind of thing.

They have something to tie round their foot.

So I could get you to wear this cuz you're trying to run away from this project.

I should put you in one of these.

Where's the other one?

That's the problem.

VO: On hand to help is the center's owner, Oli.

I don't know whether to believe that or not, Oli.

Is it really a geisha's shoe?

Do we believe that?

I believe it, I think 200%.

MARGIE: Now you're gonna say that, aren't you?

What's that hole there?

RUSSELL: That's where she... Oh, is that where she laces it up?

She had a verruca.

Will you be sensible?

VO: Euch!

Japanese geishas emerged in the seventh century and studied cultural traditions of art, dance and singing.

They'd perform for the nobility and some even became concubines to the emperor.

Do you know who'd buy that?

Like a powerful woman who wants to reclaim the item of oppression for feminism.

And use it as a doorstop.

And it's all hand...hand carved.

Up yours to the patriarchy, you're a doorstop now.

And look, look, look, look... And it's got such a story behind it, I think it punches above its weight.

Anc...ancient.

I like the way he said ancient.

And it's £18.

That...that covers about 500 years.

18 quid.

That's gotta be worth a punt.

VO: One to think about.

Anything else?

These are nice.

Oh wow.

Yeah.

So it's a little book stand.

That's probably about 1880, 1890.

Are you kidding?

No.

And that's...that's a fabulous wood, that's coromandel wood.

Is that a type of tree, a coromandel tree?

Yeah, look at that.

Beautiful grain.

Yeah, it sounds like a creature, dunnit?

Yeah.

(WHISPERS) I am the coromandel.

Do you think that would do well at auction?

The heat's getting to me.

Would that do well at auction, do you think?

Well, I think it would make...

It's not gonna make anywhere near that.

Right.

But what an interesting thing.

I mean, how lovely is that?

If you're a book man, look at that, with your books in the middle of it.

There is one other thing I've seen.

Look at this table now.

MARGIE: Wow.

RUSSELL: I'm so excited.

That looks nice.

Do you know what that is?

It says it's a Victorian metamorphic davenport.

Does that mean it can change shape?

Yeah.

You know where the name davenport comes from?

No.

Cuz there's a very famous furniture maker called Gillows.

Right.

And in the books of Gillows, they said "To Captain Davenport, a desk."

And since that day, these small desks have been called davenports.

MARGIE: So, even before shops... RUSSELL: Is it a writing desk?

It is.

And is it...

If you're bad at writing, that stops you sliding off?

Yeah, but this is a metamorphic, which means it's gonna do all sorts of other things.

Oh, it did mean changing shape.

What type of wood is this?

This is rosewood, which is lovely.

But it's not been messed about and this is Edwardian, so this is like 1890, 1900s.

I don't want to be conspiratorial but it's been reduced once, so they might be keen to sell.

VO: With an original price of 345 it's already been discounted by £50.

I think this and geisha shoe is the way forward.

VO: Oi, Oli, you're needed again!

What would be the absolute best price you could do on this?

I think the very very least he'd do is 200.

MARGIE: That's fair enough for that.

Geisha shoe, obviously that's 18 quid.

No problem.

200 quid on that.

Shall we do it?

Shall we?

Let's do it.

Sold.

Thank you very much.

RUSSELL: Yes!

MARGIE: (LAUGHS) I feel really excited.

VO: That leaves Russell and Margie with a total of £119 left to spend.

Well done, you two.

All done for the day then.

You enjoying your little road trip with me?

I'm loving your company, hon.

You're a nice lady.

That's the correct answer.

I'm knackered.

How do you unwind after a day like this?

I'm absolutely knackered.

Eh...well mine's a lime and soda.

You seem like the type of person who'd be swilling a brandy whilst looking across your land.

Do I?

VO: Sleep tight, everyone.

VO: Good morning!

And what a glorious day, eh?

(AJ LAUGHS) VO: What's the cheery chat in the Land Rover?

Oh my God, I'm so sorry.

This'll be the only Antiques Road Trip where we end up in neck braces at the end of it.

(LAUGHS) (DOG BARKS) RUSSELL: Is that like a dog zoo?

AJ: It's a dog zoo.

BOTH: Argh!

VO: Down boy.

Woof woof!

Yesterday Russell went on a spending spree with Margie.

He bought an art nouveau coffee pot, a Toby jug, a supposed geisha's shoe and a Victorian davenport desk, as you do.

Surely this is worth a gamble.

VO: He has £119 left to spend.

Under the tutelage of Phil, AJ bought a 17th century oak coffer.

I could kiss you.

Mwah, mwah.

VO: She has 270 left in her purse.

VO: How are Margie and Phil this morning?

In recovery?

Tell me a joke.

Did Russell tell you lots of jokes?

Tell me a joke.

Do you wanna hear my joke?

Go on, tell me.

How do you make gold soup?

You put nine carrots in it.

MARGIE: Aww.

PHIL: Pitiful.

Christmas cracker, innit?

Absolutely pitiful.

Now, he is observational, isn't he?

Well he'd have had a fair amount of observational new material yesterday, wouldn't he, working with you for a day?

VO: (LAUGHS) The old ones are the best, including the experts.

Now it's time to reassemble and check out each other's buys.

RUSSELL: You have a good night's rest?

Yeah, I did.

Come and look what we've got.

Ooh!

Well, what we're changing here is the selling strategy.

Right, yeah?

I'm selling you a dream.

That's more of a nightmare.

(MARGIE LAUGHS) You think this is a good thing, then?

Listen, it's his day.

Babe, it is a good thing, cuz I only dropped 28 sheets on this, sweet.

On a jug?

Wait a second, that's just the warmup.

I hope you sit down at our metamorphic davenport desk.

I actually like that.

That's really nice.

PHIL: How much?

MARGIE: We're excited.

That's the nitty gritty.

How much?

It was on for 345 originally.

How much do you think we got it for?

300?

200.

Oh!

# Does that sting when it goes in your ears?

# So what have you bought?

Listen, our thing is so good, it's being couriered, flanked by armed guards and a police escort... Yeah.

..to the sale room as we speak.

MARGIE: Really?

AJ: As we speak.

It's already gone, it's too hot to handle.

You sure it's not just that you had a silly little boot and it wouldn't fit.

PHIL: No... AJ: That as well, that as well.

Don't just focus on the one item, talk us through the other things you got.

Well, d'you know what...

Anyway, I think it's time for us to go now.

I, uh... Yeah, you know.

We got this.

We have got this.

It's been lovely, lovely.

We'll see you later.

PHIL: Let's get out of here.

VO: I was actually thinking the same thing.

Off you pop, you lot!

RUSSELL: God almighty!

(MARGIE LAUGHS) You know, it'll be interesting, it'll be really really interesting at the auction.

AJ: I don't want interesting.

PHIL: Why not?

I want money, I want cash, I want profit!

So you're still feeling all geed up and competitive?

Yeah, I've scented blood today, when I saw Phil tremble.

Let's have it!

That's what I say.

Let's have it!

That's what we say.

Honestly, you think we're on the road to Penkridge, we're actually on the road to victory!

Hey hey!

VO: Yep, all noses are pointed to Staffordshire and Penkridge for the auction.

But first, shopping.

And our destination is Kingswinford, just outside Dudley.

AJ and Phil have bought only that coffer.

Please sir, she wants some more.

Here's hoping the Old Curiosity Shop has some Dickensian priced antiques.

Bah, humbug!

And in you go!

Look at that lot.

Gosh.

AJ: Look.

(GLASS CLINKS) PHIL: Oh!

Are these glass walking sticks?

Yeah.

They're quite cool, aren't they?

Who on earth is using a glass walking stick?

Well, they're not for use, they're just for decorative purposes.

That looks like it's a little child's, or meant to be a child's, little cranberry grass stick.

But these are quite old.

Originally these were sort of like end of the day things.

If there was spare glass leftover the workers would make themselves a stick or all sorts of different things.

And they'd have probably been sold locally, just for probably a bit of beer money initially.

They are quite collectable.

What I like about them is that they're from this area and it's an industry that isn't around here anymore.

So someone's gonna buy these.

The valuable ones are the air twist ones where they've got like a swirl going all the way down the column.

But I think those are quite sweet.

That says glass cane.

That says 25 quid.

Put them down and we'll keep a mental note about these.

AJ: OK. PHIL: Let's have a look.

Look at you trusting me with the glass, eh?

Yeah, I trust you implicitly, AJ, implicitly.

I'll be careful.

VO: Careful!

The glass sticks are one possible.

On we browse.

VO: Spy anything else?

Are these a couple of shot glasses?

Well, no, I can tell you now.

Way-hey!

PHIL: Forget that one.

AJ: OK. PHIL: Dismissed, dismissed.

AJ: Disregard that.

But that's lovely.

This is an illusion glass.

If you put your finger in there, can you just feel how the bottom is very very thin?

And the outside... AJ: Oh, it is!

PHIL: Yeah.

And that's designed to give the illusion that you're drinking more than you do.

So if you're drinking with your mates, right, you can drink out of a glass like this and it looks like you're drinking lots.

Whereas they...are drinking lots.

So they can quietly get inebriated while you remain stone cold sober, giving the illusion that you're drinking with them.

I mean, they probably date to the back end of the 19th century.

I just think they're really...

They just make me laugh.

They make me laugh as well.

A lot of fun, but is it actually worth anything?

Yeah, they are, they're quite collectable, they're really quite collectable.

You could buy one, you could have Russell down for drinks one evening...

Yes!

You could have that, he could have another one.

You could just absolutely cane him.

Literally.

I could cane Russel Kane.

I like the sound of that.

See, there you go!

(WHISPERS) 48 quid!

That's a boatload.

You take that to the till, I'll go and get the glass sticks and I'll see you there.

I'll drink to that.

VO: Time to talk money.

Val is in charge today.

Does she know what's gonna hit her?

AJ: We like these pieces.

Yes.

I think we want all three of them, though.

The two sticks and this quirky little shot glass.

What is your best price on 'em?

I've gotta say 30 for the two.

And 20 on that.

So...so what is that?

What's my maths?

Well my maths is bad, I was... PHIL: Is that 45 altogether?

AJ: I was hoping that... She is joking!

She's no good at sums, is she?

45.

Is that 45 altogether?

That's what my maths was saying.

I think we went to the same school cuz I was hoping it'd be 45.

PHIL: Can we buy it for 45 quid?

VAL: Yes.

Yeah.

45.

Yes!

PHIL: Shake hands, quick.

Thank you.

Let's shake hands on that.

VO: That makes it down to £30 for the two sticks and 15 for the illusion glass.

VO: Russell and Margie are having a break from shopping.

They're headed to Birmingham on a musical detour.

Yeah, so what's your taste in music?

RnB, hip hop.

I like American hip hop.

I like British grime.

I like J Hus, Stormzy, those sorts of people.

I'm sure you like those as well.

I've got a CD of Stormzy in the boot of my car from one of my daughters.

A CD?

Did he actually release a CD?

MARGIE: I'm sorry... RUSSELL: An 8-track, you mean?

Oh, whatever.

(HE LAUGHS) MARGIE: Whatever!

VO: Yeah, keep up, Marge.

RUSSELL: We do listen to classical music when I'm working.

I like to type to it sometimes.

I like to tidy up to it.

VO: I can just see Russ in a pinny conducting Mozart with a feather duster, can't you?

VO: What better venue though for a detour than the home of one of Britain's longest running classical music festivals?

Welcome to Birmingham Town Hall.

RUSSELL: I think we're going in here.

Ah!

In we go.

MARGIE: Ooh!

Open sesame.

VO: Opening in 1834, this magnificent and monumental building was architecturally one of the first of its kind in Victorian England.

VO: Here to tell them more is Town Hall guide, Fred Cork.

What a gorgeous building.

Not the first time I've been in here, Margie.

Just last year I actually played at Birmingham Town Hall on tour.

And the only thing I remember about it is these beautiful blue walls and all the frescoes and all the features.

But I never looked into the history of it.

My adrenaline was pumping, I'd had a coffee and Imodium, I just wanted to get on stage.

(MARGIE LAUGHS) Tell me the history of this place.

Well it was the 18th century, Russell, Birmingham desperately needed a hospital to meet the needs of the poor.

But in those times, the hospitals were charitable hospitals.

And so money had to be raised by the towns and cities themselves, no money coming from government.

Then Birmingham decided to raise money to build a hospital by having the first ever music festival.

RUSSELL: So it's the first ever Live Aid.

There would've been a Brummie Bob Geldof going, (BRUMMIE ACCENT) "We need to really raise some money 'ere, "we could put on a gig or something."

Brilliant idea though.

FRED: So in 1768, three days in September, a music festival was held in the local parish church of St Philip's.

St Philip's was not regarded big enough, large enough, to host it.

And by 1830, there was demand for a bigger building.

VO: And with the pressure on, the public got what the public wanted.

The town hall was built, completed in 1834.

It was a hugely impressive example of neoclassical architecture and crucially the perfect venue for the increasingly popular classical music festival.

So who played here, then?

We've had Elgar, we've had Rachmaninoff, Yehudi Menuhin.

Probably the biggest impact was made by Mendelssohn because he had a big say in the organ, not just the design but also the positioning of the organ.

VO: Of course, the finest music hall in the country needed an organ to match.

At 70 feet high, the town hall organ case is as tall as two double-decker buses standing end on end.

Wow.

The largest metal pipe is the height of an average house.

It's grown over the years from 3,000 to 6,000 pipes.

Resident organ scholar is Joshua Roebuck.

RUSSELL: Wow!

Is it intimidating playing an organ that was once the finest instrument in the whole of Europe?

JOSHUA: It's really a luxury like driving a Rolls-Royce.

It has every sound you could possibly wish for and it is much more daunting than playing in a cathedral because I'm used to being hidden away.

And on here, you're sort of in the very center, quite literally, of the whole place.

How does it actually work?

Sorry for so basic a question but where does the wind come from?

So, the wind today comes from electronic blowers.

It's no longer hand pumped by small children.

Is that what it was in earlier days?

Yes, it would originally have been hand pumped.

Probably taking about four or five men pumping the bellows to provide enough air for the whole room.

I bet you that's what my ancestors would've done.

(MARGIE LAUGHS) Been organ pumpers.

FRED: It became so popular that they actually built another second circle balcony.

From an acoustic point of view, it was hopeless.

But in satisfying the numbers who wanted to attend here... MARGIE: It's popular music at the time, isn't it?

It is, yeah.

But now it's gone back to the original with one balcony, as you can see.

VO: 108 years since it opened its doors, the town hall remains one of Britain's most iconic buildings.

Built to fund a hospital, today it continues to serve the community.

PHIL: What I think is the key to you and I doing so well is we've both got that young, vibrant, free spirit, you know, trendy, cool.

You know, you bring... Yeah?

What do I bring?

Tell me cuz I'm not sure.

I've been trying to find out for years what I bring.

But I'd like you to tell me.

What do I bring?

I think you bring the expertise.

Really?

And then I bring...bring the charm.

VO: And I bring the directions.

Next stop, Stourbridge.

VO: AJ and Phil have £225 the kitty.

They're spoiled for choice here at Grandad's Attic.

Oh my gosh!

If this is what I think it is, this is what people used to use back in the day because they thought it got rid of cellulite.

It's actually really good fun.

You just pop that around the problem area.

Whack it on.

Please work.

Oh, it does!

(LAUGHS) And there you have it.

You'd just stand here and think it was doing the job.

Quickness to fitness.

VO: Great idea for a new fitness video, AJ.

But perhaps not the easiest thing to sell at auction.

Uncle Phil.

I tell you what.

I found you a present.

I thought it would help you get around the shop quicker.

I can move very quickly when I want to.

Sure thing, Uncle Phil.

Ow!

Gone again.

VO: Get serious, AJ.

Where's that competitive spirit got to?

This is what I wanna buy.

What's that... Oh.

Look at those!

PHIL: Those are wicked, aren't they?

AJ: Oh my gosh, so excited.

Imagine this in a children's bedroom.

PHIL: Says here, space invader, Southend-on-Sea fairground ride.

Well, you can't argue with that.

Probably from that most favorite period of history of yours.

The 80s?

(LAUGHS) But I think that's the better one.

Yeah.

The red one definitely stands out.

PHIL: It's cooler, isn't it?

On a bad day it'll make between £80-120.

And on a good day it'll make £300-400.

That's what I think.

D'you reckon?

Yeah, I do.

But we just, you know, who knows?

You're in the lap of the gods with that.

You are really in the lap of the gods.

Are you gonna get in one?

D'you reckon I could fit in?

PHIL: I'm sure I couldn't.

Honestly, I definitely... Maybe that one, definitely not this one.

This has got a headpiece in it and everything.

PHIL: I so wish I'd got 10p to put in there now.

Ahh!

I'm in.

Absolutely bonkers.

Imagine putting on your games console in this.

That looks really cool.

I'd buy that.

AJ, you stuck in there?

I might be a little bit stuck.

PHIL: Now AJ, come on.

Stop messing around.

VO: Oh, AJ.

Do keep it together.

Ahh!

VO: The fairground rides are not priced.

Time to consult the dealer, "Granddad" Dave.

You out there now?

I'm out.

Hello.

Hello.

This is amazing.

It's fantastic.

So much fun.

What is your best price?

With that one, should be 295.

Yeah.

Best on that would be 225.

Oh, you're breaking my heart.

PHIL: I've got in my pocket £225.

DAVE: Yeah.

PHIL: Right?

PHIL: We're gonna buy that.

DAVE: OK.

But we're gonna find something else as well.

We're not gonna abuse you.

For £10?

Well it might be 20 quid.

It'll be under £20, is that a deal?

OK. Yeah, I think that's a deal.

Under £20, we can find something under £20.

Yeah.

And so we'll have that and something under 20 quid, alright?

DAVE: That's a deal, yes.

AJ: Yay!

Go on, give him a big hug, AJ.

I'm so excited!

Right, we're gonna go and find something and we'll come back.

Come on, AJ.

Concentrate now, look, concentrate.

Uh, so fun.

That's gonna be the hard part.

What about this?

No, no, no, no.

Two for tea, tea for two?

VO: No.

Keep browsing.

Ooh.

What about this?

MUSIC: "Doctor Who Theme" This is K9 from Doctor Who.

PHIL: AJ, do you actually like that?

D'you know what, it doesn't matter whether I like it or not.

Do you think it'd do well at auction?

Actually I do cuz Doctor Who's got a huge following, so let's find Dave and see if we can work the charm offensive.

Yes.

VO: A great find.

The longest running science fiction series on the telly has many loyal fans.

OK, so, said that we could have the fairground ride... Mm)hm.

..with something else for 225 quid.

We absolutely love this.

No price tag on it.

No, OK. Em, I can do that for 20.

And I'll do the fairground ride for 205 so that's 225.

Brilliant job.

Oh my gosh.

Thank you so much.

Right from the very start I said that I wanted to spend every single penny.

And you have.

And I have!

VO: Those last two buys conclude AJ and Phil's shopping.

While they put their feet up, whither Russell and Marge?

So how much have we got left exactly?

119.

119.

So we could get a nice... Pheasant, careful!

They're thick as absolute... Ooh, it's a lady one.

VO: Their final shopping trip is still in the West Midlands, near the village of Balsall Common, Solihull.

VO: Antiques in a Barn is kind of what it says on the tin.

Or on the barn, in this case.

An array of 18th to 20th century antiques in a 17th century barn.

Lovely.

RUSSELL: And...stop.

I'm never gonna stop loving neutral, Margie.

(SHE LAUGHS) Just think, you survived.

VO: There he goes, full of beans as ever.

First stop, cabinets.

But what's that?

RUSSELL: I'm trying to work out what this is.

You fathom it out, don't you?

French.

And I think if you...

It's a mold to make the doll's head, isn't it?

Oh, right.

I'm interested cuz I've never seen one.

Listen...

Whether or not it's a buying... ..if we're gonna try and sell a geisha shoe, we need a detached doll's head mold to go with it.

MARGIE: Bit creepy, innit?

Em, I tell you what I'm immediately drawn to.

These pocket watches.

VO: Finally, Russ has found his thing - watches.

And there's a fair few in this cabinet.

Hello, I'm Russell.

Nice to meet you.

Hello, nice to meet you.

I'm Margie Cooper.

Hello, I'm Diane.

Diane.

Diane, so I'm just looking at your watches.

In a previous life I sold watches so I'm determined to take something horological to the auction.

VO: Horologically, it's time for a closer look.

Right.

Ooh!

Woah.

My goodness, what is that?

DIANE: It's a buttonhole watch.

RUSSELL: It is not!

MARGIE: How funny is that?

That is gorgeous.

It's not still working, it can't be?

I believe it is, yeah.

VO: A nice example too.

But time to make a decision.

RUSSELL: I mean, I know you think we should buy a weird detached serial killer doll's head... MARGIE: No, no, no, no, no, I do not.

But that needs a collector's sale.

Not a general sale.

Believe me.

VO: Wise words Margie.

Wise words, girl.

It's absolutely stunning.

VO: But is he listening?

Nope.

MARGIE: So how much is this curious thing?

The best on it I can do is 130.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Eh, it's rare.

Yeah, it is rare.

I've never seen one before.

Yeah, I...I think it's very specialist, and we haven't got 130 quid.

So shall we forget that?

RUSSELL: So the button watch, how much is that?

I've spoken to the owner and his best price would be 130.

At a push, 120.

(MARGIE CHUCKLES) It is rare.

This was either meant to be or it's so close it's killing me.

I have in my pocket 119, £119.

Could you possibly go and have a word with... DIANE: I will do.

I'm really sorry, he can't do it.

MARGIE: Oh my goodness.

D'you know what I've always fancied?

MARGIE: What?

RUSSELL: A doll's head.

(THEY LAUGH) VO: With the doll head mold and buttonhole watch out of budget, Margie's turning to what she knows best.

That is the copy... A copy of the oldest spoon in England.

RUSSELL: Ah!

MARGIE: Right?

Now imagine it that size.

What's the oldest spoon in England?

In the Tower of London.

That is the coronation spoon.

Oh right.

And the oil goes in there.

And the monarch is anointed on her chest, No way.

..on her head, on her wrist.

Wicked.

That's why... That's done in private, although she's there in the abbey.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's done privately cuz you have to do that and do that and do that.

So you must have seen a fair few of those then?

Yeah, but they're always...

They're solid sellers, are they?

This is silver.

These were brought out with the coronation of each monarch.

So is that...

So they...so, like, they're either 1901, 1930s when George... DIANE: It's 1901.

MARGIE: Good.

RUSSELL: Edward VII?

MARGIE: Yeah.

DIANE: Yep.

MARGIE: Edward VII.

That's a nice thing.

DIANE: And it's a good weight.

RUSSELL: I don't know, how much is it?

The best of all price on that is £40 and that would be cash.

I...I think that's a good buy.

Because I've sold many, many, many, many of these.

And I haven't sold them for 40 quid.

RUSSELL: Let's close on that.

MARGIE: Close on that.

We'll close, it's a deal.

£40 please for the Edward VII spoon.

I'm very happy about that, got some silver.

VO: That £40 for the coronation spoon means Russell and Margie are done.

VO: That's the end of shopping for this jolly romp.

So have you enjoyed the road trip?

I have absolutely loved this road trip.

Yeah.

Great views, stunning car and great company.

What an angel you are!

I'm quite passionate about our items, and I think, you never know, I might get a result.

PHIL: The only thing I wanna do is let's just finish it off with a really nice win.

Icing on the cake that'd be.

VO: Icing indeed.

Sweet dreams.

VO: Welcome to Staffordshire.

It's a lovely morning for an auction.

How's the Volvo, AJ?

I think me and this car get on like a house on fire.

Beautiful, stylish, classy and full of personality.

Little bit like me, some might say.

Sort of difficult to operate as well.

(THEY LAUGH) VO: Cheeky!

Our celebrities sallied forth from Weston Heath.

Now they're headed to their final destination.

Penkridge.

The only auction I've ever gone to is when I was 18 years old buying my first car.

I've been to loads.

A lot of the events I host have auctions at the end of the night for charity fundraising, I've auctioned things.

I've done "you sir, you sir look like you're gonna bid.

"Please don't make me sell this for 1,200 quid.

"I'm cry...

I'm gonna buy it myself.

"You sir, thank you, 1,300."

I've done all of that.

So, AJ, our experts are waiting.

Put your foot down in a safe and vigilant manner.

Let's get going.

Yeah.

That's enough, that's enough!

VO: It's market day in Penkridge and the place is jumping.

We're not here to buy fruit and veg, though.

We're selling antiques, no more than a stone's throw from the river Penk, at Cuttlestones.

AJ: Here they are.

MARGIE: Here they come!

AJ: Hiya!

VO: Let's not hang about.

RUSSELL: How're you doing?

MARGIE: Very well.

I think the auction's started, so we need to get in there to see a famous victory.

Who for?

Us.

Obviously the people with the glass walking sticks are gonna win.

(THEY LAUGH) Get in there.

VO: You really ought to get a shifty on, chaps.

Russell and Margie spent £321 on five lots.

Including that geisha shoe.

Well, sort of geisha shoe.

AJ: It's bizarre.

Don't you think you'd want two of them?

Exactly, that was my point.

You want a pair.

Who has one shoe?

VO: One shoe, and one spoon.

I always thought that Russel Kane was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

Me too.

He really was born with a silver spoon in his...

I think he has the whole canteen there now.

Come on.

VO: AJ and Phil went for broke spending every penny of their £400 budget.

A fair sum of which went on the fairground ride.

So, this would be... 1980s.

..Edwardian?

MARGIE: It looks like a helmet for a giant.

This could be jeopardy for them, jeopardy, jeopardy.

Cuz they paid £205 for it.

VO: And they splashed 130 on this coffer.

I love it.

The color's right, everything's right.

It'd be a shame if someone damaged one of the legs, wouldn't it?

Oh, there's a scratch on that, mate.

VO: Oi, none of that!

Let's hear the wise words of today's gavel basher, Ben Gamble.

(GAVEL) So, the silver plated art nouveau coffee pot, I so wish this had silver hallmarks.

If so, it would absolutely fly out of the saleroom.

So, it is only plated, but it is quite stylish, being sort of art nouveau.

I think that'll do OK. Let's see.

Dr Who and K9, this is a blast from the past.

I can remember this from probably 30 or so years ago.

I think it's really cool.

I think it's one of the nicest lots we've got today.

So, yeah, I think this is gonna do quite well.

You never know, I might even have a sneaky bid myself on this.

VO: I think it's going to be a great sale.

The room is full.

Phone bidders are on the line.

And the internet is plugged in.

Are you ready?

Take your seats!

MARGIE: Here we are.

RUSSELL: Exciting.

We are just in time.

We are.

VO: First up, AJ's two glass walking sticks.

What we really want is a comic called Kane, who could use these... D'you know what, it's where the money is.

Glass zimmer frames.

At £28 I'm only bid there on the net.

Who would like... 30 bid, 30 in the room, at £30.

Two, at 35.

(CLEARS THROAT) 38.

40.

Just have a quick word with him, would you?

All done there, at £45?

VO: A profit from the off, look.

VO: Great start.

Don't be proud of peddling glass walking sticks.

Really?

Oh, give it a rest!

Dangerous.

VO: Old Russell Kane was a merry old soul and a merry old soul was he.

I can't believe this, but somebody's left a broken old Toby jug in the saleroom.

Who would've done that?

Who would've done that?

Starting at £5 bid, and I'm glad of it.

At £5.

£5 bid, at eight.

Don't gloat.

Don't gloat.

10, in the room!

Will you stop doing it?

The man in the clown uniform...

It's solid.

Going there at £10.

VO: The Toby jug sells for a loss.

Not so merry now!

Russell, did they tell you the rules of this thing before you started?

We got away with that.

Cuz you have to try and make, make money.

We're going to lull you into a false sense of security.

Oh, you've done that.

VO: Next up, AJ and Phil's toasting glass.

If this auction was in Essex, you'd make a lot of money for Sambuca.

Again, with interest, on the internet.

No!

At £12.

Shall we 15 or not, quickly?

At £12.

15 bid on the net, at 15.

At £15.

Are we 18 in the room?

Park it.

Selling and done, at £15.

VO: Well, that's wiped its face!

If you'd gone for a shot glass, you would've made money.

Seriously, you could put a Sambuca in it, bit of history, knock it back, out on the town.

Yeah.

VO: Yeah, now, any big footed Geishas missing a shoe in the room today?

Best foot forward.

Can I just say, shoe.

Not shoes or pair of.

AJ: Yeah.

PHIL: Shoe.

So, hold tight for the one legged geisha, who...

Shoes are made for walking.

Or hopping in this case.

Three lights flashing on the internet.

But it tells me £5.

(MARGIE LAUGHS) Eight.

It's flashing a bit quicker now, at £8.

£10.

Come on.

At £12.

Go on, creep up.

All done, at £12?

VO: Ouch.

VO: It's only a small loss though.

You're getting walked all over with that geisha shoe.

VO: Next, it's The Doctor's loyal companion.

Down boy.

It's K9.

I'm backing you on this, I've gotta be honest.

I think it's gonna fetch 75 quid.

RUSSELL: I'm not just saying it.

I would bid for that if I were not playing.

Dr Who's dog, K9.

Did you feel the ripple in the room?

There's a ripple.

£15 on the net.

18, 20, 28, 30, all on the net.

32.

Still going at 35.

RUSSELL: It's going, it's going, it's doing it!

38.

38.

I don't know why I'm excited.

It's your item.

AUCTIIONEER: 40.

RUSSELL: Oh!

AUCTIONNER: Five.

At £45 bid.

MARGIE: Go on.

50.

At £55.

PHIL: AJ, try and look gracious.

I love it.

Selling at £55.

VO: Good boy!

(PANTS) And a good profit!

Well done.

Well done.

Deserved.

Really, really good.

VO: Next up, Russell's coffee pot.

Silver plated.

MARGIE: Water or coffee.

RUSSELL: Coffee.

PHIL: Water.

RUSSELL: Listen... AJ: It's water.

RUSSELL: Coffee is water to me.

£10 bid for lot 70A.

At £10.

12's on the net, at £12.

We all done?

Going then at £12, on the net.

VO: That's the third consecutive loss for Russell and Margie.

Don't get too cocky.

VO: Right, next the turn of Phil and AJ's big, big spend.

I'm feeling quietly confident.

PHIL: You are?

AJ: Yeah.

You're mad.

Not often I'm surprised by seeing something very unusual in the saleroom, and then we got Philip Serrell.

(LAUGHTER) Bids are straight in at £100, 110, 120, 130, 140.

Yes!

150, 160.

Oh, my God.

170, 180.

Oh, my goodness.

Going at 180.

VO: That was close.

A gamble but great fun.

PHIL: In our world, £25 is a massive loss.

I appreciate for you two that might not be the case, but for us, that's huge, that's huge.

At least you've had a loss.

VO: Now Russell and Margie's silver anointing spoon.

Margie's expertise.

She's waded in all of her knowledge, a silver coronation spoon.

£18 bid.

MARGIE: Oh, come on.

RUSSELL: 18?

20.

At 20 I'm bid for that... You're joking.

Two.

I've got the lady at the front.

25.

Eight.

At 28.

30.

Why's it such hard work?

It's at the back of the room, and no mistake, and selling now at £30.

VO: Oh, dear!

What was that all about?

30 quid for silver!

If you need us to lend you some money...

I haven't even got my cab fare to the station.

I'm upset about that.

VO: Don't worry, there's still time for profits.

AJ and Phil's last lot is next.

The 17th century coffer.

Nice thing this.

I'm hoping it'll make £300.

You what?

I mean, hopefully.

Ye of little faith!

Starting price at £100 for lot 60A, at 110, 20.

At 130, 140.

150, 160.

Come on.

170, 180.

No!

The most expensive coffer I've sold in three years.

190, 200.

It's the best one you've seen in three years.

At £200.

210, 220.

Yes!

Smashed it.

And selling.

All done at 220.

Still cheap.

Still cheap.

VO: Well done.

Great find.

Super profit.

If that didn't sell for that price... You were never gonna speak to me, were you?

I'd have put you in it.

VO: Last chance now for Russell and Margie to make a profit.

It's their biggest spend, the davenport.

It'll be good for you to write our check on.

You know, once we've won.

To be fair, that is gorgeous.

Better than the usual.

Interest at £35.

Lot 130, at 35.

38, 40.

30... AUCTIONEER: Five.

MARGIE: What?

50.

Five.

60.

Five.

70.

That is an absolute bargain for someone.

80.

And five.

It's creeping up.

Hasn't finished yet.

90.

100, 110.

120.

Oh, please.

130.

140.

There's two people bidding on it.

160.

I'm kind of thinking that's getting close to being enough now.

170.

That is close to being enough now.

190.

200.

We've done it.

Standing bid at £200.

No.

And I sell at 200.

AJ: Yes!

PHIL: What did you pay?

How much did you pay for it?

RUSSELL: 200.

MARGIE: (LAUGHS) AJ: Did you?

RUSSELL: 200.

VO: Yep, it breaks even but, sadly, a loss after commission.

It's normally at this point that we go outside and decide who's won, but I think what we should do on this occasion is go outside and gloat.

He's pretty unattractive when he's...

He's unattractive all the time.

(SHE LAUGHS) VO: Yes, it's a formality, but let's do the maths.

VO: Russell and Margie started with £400.

They made a loss after costs of £104.52 which leaves them a final total of £295.48.

VO: AJ and Phil started with the same sum but after saleroom fees are considered, they still came out on top, making a profit of £22.30.

I hereby declare them winners.

Well done.

And all profits go to Children In Need.

Make a nice couple, don't they?

PHIL: Come on, then.

AJ: I'm feeling good.

We're good about this, we are good about this.

Well... What are you smiling for?

I am smiling.

You've done very well.

Thank you.

We're a little disappointed.

A little?

I feel like I've been kicked with a geisha shoe in the face.

(LAUGHS) We've had a lovely time.

You've done really well.

Now go on.

VO: Off we go.

MARGIE: Bye!

VO: Any celebrity gloating?

AJ: Woo-hoo!

This road trip, honestly, has been so much fun.

I've absolutely loved it... (GEARS CRUNCH, SHE SCREAMS) What about when we nearly died when you changed gear?

Did you enjoy that?

(LAUGHS) I've discovered a love of antiques.

Just think of all of the things that are way older than me!

Like MySpace and stuff like that.

But would you go on a road trip with me again?

I'd love to.

It would be so much fun!

I'll drive.

Yeah, yeah.

Definitely.

VO: Cheerio, then!

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